07.23.09
Tubed at last.
Thanks to my son Alex taking up the challenge of learning how to edit and post video (he’s 16 so he has a natural advantage) I finally have a couple of clips on YouTube, with more to come.
The challenges of selecting clips to use were more involved than either of us anticipated. First of all, audience members kept getting in front of the camera at important moments, severely limiting the number of possible vignettes available. Each animal’s part in the show has a story, and it doesn’t work well if you don’t get the whole thing.
Sound levels are a challenge too, as are the differences that can creep in between what you edit and what you post. Still trying to figure that one out.
So what you can see so far are two clips from my eighth visit to Columbus, Mississippi to perform at the famous Market Street Festival on behalf of my friends at CableOne. The first is my introduction. The second is the bit I did with my Jungle Carpet python.
So check ‘em out, leave comments and let me know what you think. I think they do give a decent idea of the look and feel of the show.
06.28.09
New Animals
Doing what I do leads to a lot of folks asking me to adopt animals that, for various reasons, they can’t continue to care for. I’ve always done what I could. Sometimes that even means that new animals end up doing the show with me, as living ambassadors for their kind.
My latest additions to the Snake Encounters roster are both very unique snakes with distinct personalities. They couldn’t be more different.
The first we have named Peter Piper – the Persnickety Pine snake. He picked a peck of pinkie pups. Actually, he’s too big even for rat pinkies – we’re talking jumbo mice or small rats for him, but they don’t begin with a P. And he has a delightfully demonstrative attitude, including what may turn out to be the best hiss in my collection. Distinctly patterned, unlike most Pine snakes – very impressive. He may well be taking the place of the smaller (but more vocal) of the two Bull snakes I currently use in the show.
The other is from the opposite side of the planet, and he’s already in the show. He’s a big, short, stout, impressive Blood python. His name is Vladamir. Generally speaking, Blood pythons are very well named, but this one’s a total sweetheart. The crowds seem to love him. Check out the pic – that head can swallow something even a bit wider than his enormous middle. The photo was done by the photography studio that was hired by Dr. Pepper/Snapple, along with me, to do their latest ad shoot – promo material for their two new flavors of the energy drink called Venom.
Posters and such with my Albino Burmese named Neon draped around a very pretty model (tough work to be sure) should be appearing now, mostly in independently owned convenience stores across the country that carry the product.
While we were at it the photography team took shots of Neon and Vladamir without the model, and DP/S gave me permission to use them. HUGE files. My computer didn’t want to be doing anything else when I opened them. Wow – these guys work at outrageous resolutions.
The Pine snake shot, in sharp contrast, is my own work. 6.2 megapixels is a completely different world to say the least. Sigh. You should’ve seen the camera setup the studio pros were using. Extremely cool. Then again, I do get a lot of mileage out of my humble Canon Powershot. Mounted on a monopod, it acts as my primary snake stick and lets me tell a much more specific tale about what exactly is the nature of someone’s snake problem and what needs to be done about it.
So here they are for the first time on the web, Peter Piper the Pine snake and Vladamir – the Blood python!


05.10.09
Jeff Dunham and Brian Haner
Julie and I went to see Jeff Dunham at the American Airlines Center (home of the recently hapless Dallas Mavericks) on Friday. I’ve been a fan for years and had begun to count him among my top four favorite performing comedians, but this show has me beginning to consider Jeff the funniest man alive.
He’s my age, so at about the same time in the same part of the country he and I were doing our first gigs at age 8. Yep, I started out onstage at age 6 doing my first bit part in a musical (Mom was the director of the local high school theater department) but my first solo gig was as a ventriloquist. I did mostly church crowds back then, plus my school of course. It never occurred to me to look into getting paid for it. Apparently it did to Jeff. He was actually audited 5 years later. I gave it up when my falsetto voice went away (never to completely return, and that was my character’s voice) but I’ve always had a special place in my heart for vent work.
Very few people realize what a combination of actor, comedian, puppeteer, singer and organized schizophrenic a good ventriloquist must be. Not to mention the hours and hours of practice it takes just to develop the basic lip control. Try this, part your lips slightly and try to say this sentence, “Badgers find many wonderful people vexing” without moving them. Several consonants, normally created by lip movements, must be recreated with significant tongue gymnastics.
To Jeff’s list, add comedy writer and master craftsman. I didn’t know this until I saw the live show (an absolutely inspired slide slow for people waiting in their seats showed facts and figures, pics from his past and a hilarious Q&A with Walter. One of my favorites was Q: Ginger or Mary Ann? A: Mrs. Howell). Except for Peanut, his wisecracking, hyperactive purple alien character (the first one I saw him with) all of his now very famous ensemble, Walter, Jose Jalapeno, Bubba J and Achmed the Dead Terrorist were made by Jeff. That’s HUGE.
I’ve thought many times about doing a snake puppet bit in my show, but Jeff and Terry Fator have raised the bar very high as to what would be good enough to warrant the weeks and weeks of practice it would take to regain my labial skills and develop a routine worthy of including. I have the concept in mind, including the adaptation of a principle from magic that would make my figure completely unique, but also quite expensive. We’ll see. I’ve said it before. With the right resources, I could be Snakefreid and Roy.
So as the show began, we were introduced to the opening act – Guitar Guy! Yes, he speaks! His show was standup and musical comedy, and it was absolutely wonderful. His real name is Brian Haner and even though he’s currently playing straighter man to Jeff’s straight man (no mic – just take the abuse in silence, please) don’t be surprised to see Brian hitting the big time on his own soon. His show rocked. I’ve always loved a well-written comedy song, and this guy delivers. He’s also one of the best solo guitarists I’ve ever seen. His finale was breathtaking. His son is Synyster Gates, lead guitarist of very successful band Avenged Sevenfold. That apple didn’t fall two inches from the tree. Talent out both ears.
As for Jeff, the new material was even better than I expected, interwoven seamlessly with bits the audience clearly knew as well as he did. A good belly laugh is as medicinal as anything a doctor or a shaman can deliver, and the show was chock full of ‘em. He started off with some standup of his own, and it was good to see Jeff getting the laughs directly for a change. Then we were treated to everyone we wanted to see, Walter (who knows how to be topical in Jeff’s hometown) Achmed (Jeff’s simultaneous control of his voice, mouth, body, eyes, and eyebrows is just unbelievable) Peanut, Jose Jalapeno (on a Steek) Guitar Guy of course – and an encore with the redneck return of Bubba J!
Humornirvana. Two thumbs up. Best performance I’ve seen this century. Congrats, Jeff and Brian. Well done.
And then? Well, thanks to the perfect temperatures, out in the SUV were three road boxes. We spent midnight to 4am shooting a creepy snake-in-the-bathroom scene for an upcoming indie film called “Love Thy Neighbor.” Stay tuned for more on that.
05.06.09
Back to Mississippi!
We love doing Market Street Festival for our friends at CableOne. It’s a great event that draws huge crowds of very fun people. The bands are always excellent, the food is a delightful slice of the South, and this year even the hotel knocked the ball out of the park.
CableOne put us up in a jacuzzi suite with a widescreen, and it was roomy and sumptuous. Just the place to recover from a ten hour drive.
We did shows at 10, noon and 2 on Saturday the 2nd and the crowds were wonderful. For some reason, the festival had rearranged the locations of several things, much farther away from our stage than any previous year (this was my eighth) but we pulled in enough for all the seats and lots of standing room.
Despite all this, the local paper barely mentioned it even though the festival itself dominated the front page. Apparently there is some kind of unhealthy media rivalry going on between the various agencies in Columbus. Figures I guess. Being the most popular festival in the area, there would be a few power plays involved.
Anyway, like I touched on in my post about Market Street last year, even though I have never lived there, Mississippi is in my blood. My mother was born and raised in Jackson, and we visited often. My aunt and several cousins live in Wesson. Most years, that’s where we have Thanksgiving.
I recently learned something from Mom’s past that’s pretty funny. When she was attending Jackson High, there was a sock hop that her friends were going to, and they asked her along. The school had hired a garage band from Tupelo High. Average copy tunes from the era, but a pretty decent band. Her friends wanted to meet the band during a break, and Mom remembers thinking the lead singer came off a little full of himself. But she did think that Elvis was a catchy name.
04.12.09
Sarcoxie High
Alllrrighty then. Back to snakes. Pardon the detour through Arkansas.
So on Wednesday we were back in AR, this time in Fayetteville to stay with my good friend Rob Kenyon and his family so that we could be in Sarcoxie, MO on Thursday. We really had a great time hanging with them, and Fayetteville was very enjoyable. We’ll be back.
I was scheduled to perform for the whole school, grades 5-12, in advance of a day off before a big week of academic performance testing starting Monday.
First of all, let me say this about the students in Sarcoxie, Missouri. We’ve done this show for thousands and thousands of kids of all ages across the country but this was a standout group. Sharp as a tack (sometimes my humor can be a little hard to keep up with) and they went a couple of steps beyond any group we’ve seen.
One, they went on my site before we arrived and picked out their favorite snakes to actually make posters for. I have the whole set. Funny thing is, I get pretty focused once the show begins and while I could see people holding them up, they were a little hard to read at that distance up in the bleachers (my vision’s not what it used to be and I’ve been in a little bit of denial about it) and I didn’t really catch on to exactly what they had done until the end of the show. I thought the guy cheering about Andy the Anaconda when I mentioned him, who was holding up a poster I couldn’t read, was saying his name was Andy too. Momentary cluelessness. Sorry ’bout that.
Even worse, three people picked Evie to make a poster about, which is entirely my bad. She was a wonderful part of my show, but she passed quietly away a little over a year ago after a prolonged battle with recurring upper respiratory issues. We miss her. She was a great story too. A friend of mine donated her to me after a roommate of his moved out and left her behind. The roommate was, ahem, a dancer – and Evie worked for her. I don’t know what her name was back then (I wasn’t there for her early career) but something just seemed appropriate about a large female serpent named Eve.
I shall henceforth endeavor to update my animal roster forthwith. It doesn’t even mention Capone, and I know he’s a lot of folks’ favorite.
Second, I had more help getting the show loaded in and out than I’m used to, and it was entirely, well, helpful – if you know what I mean.
But best of all, and Julie was the one to notice this first, when we let quite a crowd of them interact with several of our animals at the end of the show, the level of care and gentleness they used in touching, holding and moving them from person to person was exceptional. Usually we have to explain repeatedly that a snake will let you guide him with an open hand, but will dislike being gripped and controlled by a closed one. The tongue is for tasting the air, not the fingers. The back of the head or under the chin can be touched, but only gently and without sudden moves.
These kids already knew. When Julie and I drove out of the parking lot, she said, “That group was awesome. They actually gave me new hope for the future.” I heartily agreed. I love doing schools, but this one really stood out.
The underlying concept of this version of my show is relating the origins, side effects and cures of a learned fear like ophidiophobia to another one, the fear of taking academic performance tests. I can seriously relate to that. It happened to me. Just like working with a venomous snake that needs to be safely removed and relocated, increases in my heart and respiratory rates and the moisture level in my palms all used to hit me come testing time back when I took them.
Today, the stakes are higher. A school’s standings and available resources can also be affected by how well all of the students do on testing days. Only attendance (stay in school!) has as much bearing on access to funding. Just like seeing a grown man about to mow you down because he’s just seen a snake, it can all be very scary. But fear is transmutable.
Fear can be, with surprisingly little effort, transformed into focus, clarity and insight. Just like overcoming the fear of snakes, accurate information and a generous helping of humor can make a closely held phobia melt away like ice on a warm day. For more on overcoming ophidiophobia, check out my blog entry from July ‘08. On the other side of the fear, power is waiting.
I remember back in my own school days, the test that intimidated me most was the IQ test, because here were a few pieces of paper that were literally going to judge me, relative to all other humans, as to how smart I was.
I later came up with a little trick that overcame both the fear and the focus problems with IQ tests. Faced with a time deadline and all those questions to answer and problems to solve, I devised a system. If I thought I knew the answer but wasn’t quite sure, I marked my best guess and put a check mark in the margin beside it.
If I didn’t have a clue as to the right answer, I took a wild guess and put a little circle (like a zero) in the margin next to it. I made no extra marks next to answers I was sure of. Then, when I finished the test and had minutes to spare, I was able to easily revisit the check marks first, to see if my mind, now freshly looking at problems I had waffled on before and no longer bogged down by the remainder of the test, could come up with new insight into the answers. It often did.
Then, if I had the time after double checking the checks, I took another look at all the circles – problems I had been clueless about earlier. Frequently even these became easier to work now that the entire test was behind me. Sounds weird to say it, but this trick actually raised my IQ.
Come to think of it, if everyone in a school were to use the same system, the teachers grading the tests would be able to tell exactly how well it was working for each student. Pretty cool.
So now we’re feeling completely involved in the efforts of this excellent bunch of students in the coming week. Go Bears! We’re rooting for you in Texas.
Take it easy on the Easter candy today so you get a good night’s sleep, but recent research says that gnawing the head off of that chocolate bunny tomorrow morning (after a good breakfast) will actually raise your scores. You have a great school – one to be proud of. Now – get in there and prove it to the rest of The Show Me State.
03.23.09
Part 4 – These rocks rock.
Hard to believe all this came from a single day’s digging. I’m getting the knack of using the sun to bring out the beauty of these crystals in the pics below.
The latest discoveries are really amazing. Check ‘em out.


03.19.09
Crystals Part 3, First Revelations
The first oxalic acid bath is complete and while some of the stones need another, I’m posting pics of a few that are complete.
My camera doesn’t really do them justice, probably more because of my limited expertise as a closeup photographer than the limitations of the camera, but somehow blaming the equipment feels better.
It’s so amazing to gaze into the water clarity of some of these buried treasures that we dug out of the Arkansas clay. To see them emerge from the dust and rust to show their stuff is awe inspiring. Even the tiny ones have amazing personalities upon closer inspection.
If you’re looking for a field trip that will bring you together and restore a sense of wonder in our relationship to Mother Earth, this is an idea to consider.
While these clearly aren’t museum quality pieces, most of them are really beautiful and all are completely unique. Not bad for a single day on the mountain.
Daryl



03.09.09
Crystals Part 2
This is another of my “where the heck are the snakes in this?” posts, but the Arkansas crystal hunting trip has been a significant sideline lately.
Quartz is far more common than diamonds (though not as much so as a certain cartel would have us believe) and therefore not worth much per carat, but the reason that it’s so pricey to own a large, unusual or exceptionally intact specimen is not only the rarity of such an occurrence, but the pain in the posterior it is to bring a collected specimen to market readiness.
Seriously, this is a lot of work. Detailed, methodical, repetitive and time consuming. Given my personality, I really shouldn’t be having as much fun doing it as I am.
The clay doesn’t just wash off. Stones that were soaking must then be dried so the clay contracts and another power washing session can remove more. These deposits prevent the acid bath that will follow from getting to some of the rust that prevents the natural clarity from coming through.
Not only that, but I’m trying to end up with usable clay sediments as a byproduct, because of its healing properties. Seriously, Joan took a nasty cut from one of the crystals she found and it bled only briefly, healed over by the end of the afternoon, and never hurt at all beyond the initial cut.
A nearby newbie miner asked John the guide for a band-aid after a cut. We heard him tell her, “It won’t stay on for more than a few minutes of digging. The clay will heal it.” It’s true.
Here are some pics of this stage of the cleaning process. Pieces that were barely identifiable under all that mud and clay are beginning to show their stuff, and the next drying stage is underway.
03.07.09
Crystals
Between snake shows this time of year (off-peak for Snake Removal but also Blue and Gold Banquet season – to a Cub Scout, I’m a rock star) we were talking with our friends Randy and Joan about Arkansas.
Julie and I have long been drawn to the unique geometric beauty and energy resonance of quartz crystals. About 70% of the Earth’s crust is quartz in its myriad forms, and we’ve recently discovered life forms on the planet that are based on silicon (like quartz) not carbon. In many traditions, Mother Earth is alive – and very conscious. These beautiful stones really seem to clearly if subtly prove it.
Joan had been to Arkansas on a couple of occasions to visit one of the mines that is open to the public wishing to dig for these little gems. I realized that the window of great weather for such a day on a mountaintop might not last (it’s getting warm fast) and a couple of days later we were on the road. We traveled North of Hot Springs to one of the mines located there, and spent a whole day digging in the dirt. And the mud. And the clay. Very fun indeed. Julie was as happy as a lark digging away at her pile of tailings from the mine below.
The trick to finding these little treasures, many of which are quite small but still beautiful, is to be slow and patient, stopping to soak in the nature around you from time to time. That was right down her alley.
The mine charged a flat fee per visitor to leave with whatever they could dig up and carry off.
So it was that we drove back to Dallas with a couple of boxes of rocks covered in red mud. This begins the second discovery of each item, as you clean them off in preparation for a diluted acid bath to remove the iron oxide and reveal the clear or white crystalline structures beneath. As of today, we’re past the first washing and into the second soaking as the pics below will show.
Turns out oxalic acid is hard to find in Dallas, but all the rock shops were closed as we left Arkansas. I may resort to muriatic instead, but it’s more dangerous to work with so we’ll see. I’ll post some after pics once the cleaning process is complete.
Randy took care of the dog, the cats and the horse for us, and we really had a blast learning to dig for buried treasure. It is really amazing to realize that the crystal you’ve just dug out of the clay may well be seeing the sunlight for the first time in a couple hundred million years or so.


















